It's finally here, Game of Thrones is back in less than one week. Given that this show is more popular in our office than Tyrion Lannister's bed, we decided it was necessary to find the best bottles of booze with the most badass names, that, for the purposes of our entertainment, we are going to pretend were inspired by all of our favorite characters in the Seven Kingdoms. Enjoy! And drink a bottle in honor of whomever you choose, but do it soon because we can never be sure how long they will stick around for.
This Scotch is named after the Isle of Skye where the distillery is located due to the extremely harsh weather conditions it often experiences. These weather conditions may not rival those north of the Wall, but we're glad we don't live there.
Find the eye of the storm here. $64.99
Jon Snow, this one's for you. The distillery named this Dark Horse because they knew they had a long road ahead when they first started making whiskey.
Ride with Jon Snow here. $64.99
Chances are, if you live in the Seven Kingdoms of Westeros, then you've had something stolen from you, usually it's your life or the life of a family member. We had to include the bourbon named in honor of the man who collected taxes for the Treasury Department and would steal bourbon from a local distillery where he collected taxes to resell as his own.
Try to steal it here. $27.99
We're not sure who wins for being more of a lost spirit in GOT, but we'll give it to the White Walkers. This Navy Style rum is an astounding 136 proof making it as dangerous for your longevity as the White Walkers.
Get Lost here. $44.99
There are more prophecies in this show than we can count, but no one can compete for the title of prophet more so than Daenys Targaryn.
Be a prophet here. $44.99
This mezcal was smuggled from Mexico to Guatemala using banditos, river rafts, bribes, disguises and late night drop points. Need we say more? Tywin Lannister might need to pay attention to this technique in the near future.
Get it legally here. $46.99
Littlefinger, aka Petyr Baelish, may not run the brothel anymore, but we're really hoping it doesn't disappear completely. So while these two Hooker's were named in honor of the infamous Union General Joseph "Fighting Joe" Hooker, we can still pretend that some of the inspiration was drawn from Tywin's home away from home.
Get Hooker's here. $44.99
Whether you hail from the North, the Rock or one of the other Seven Kingdoms, you live in a King's (or Queen's) County and what could be a better way to honor your leader than by drinking in their name?
Honor your King here. $46.99
While there is a strong possibility that no one will be saved of their sins in this show, we have to believe that at the very least, Arya Stark will be, so this one's for you.
Become absolved here. $28.99
For the nearly 500 ones we've lost along the way.
Pour one out for the homies here. $41.99
No one quite understands hedonism better than the Lannisters and with this Scotch having won World's Best Grain Whisky twice, we're pretty sure they would drink it generously, most likely while there is a battle going on in their own kingdom.
Indugle here. $97.99
We've gotta give the gin to the White Walkers for obvious reasons, but reserve the rum for the Starks. We're pretty sure that if the two groups drank them together they'd all be friends.
Protect the Wall here. $33.99
Cersei and Jaime Lannister, this one's for you guys. (mic drop)
Make this sister your sister here. $26.99
Alcohol available on this site is sold by one of these local retailers: Gramercy Wine Country, Inc. or Andrew's Wine Cellar, Inc. The specific seller varies by product, and will be identified prior to checkout.